Thursday, January 22, 2009


Most mornings I wake up to an irregular loud engine noise. It is not a constant engine, like a car running, and at first I thought it was a motorbike revving. I discovered it was one of these... So my initial thought process on most mornings goes like this: Did I sleep on the freeway? Did I join a gang of Bikers? Why is someone using one of these so early? Why do they need to undertake this job every other day? Are they being deliberately spiteful? Why on earth is it called a "Weed Wacker" when it is clearly a "Strimmer"?

So...a request for the new President.

Dear President Obama,
I realize that you may be very busy at the moment moving house and everything but could you have a word with people at Chevrolet. I recently drove the Wildside Suburban and on my return I bought a Starbucks drink. As I also bought one for Bethany I used the handy dual cup holder. It would seem that this was a huge error as a Grande Tea Latte made a break for freedom and launched itself through the passenger window. At least that is what would have happened if the window had not been closed. Instead it hit the glass and exploded all over the inside. I did not enjoy cleaning it up (please note the coloUr of the foam on the upholstery foam can and cloth which was originally white) I also do not enjoy the stagnent, stale dairy smell that now lingers - similar to the smell of vomit in an elevator*. This only compounds the irritation that the door handle on the inside of the driver's door broke making a quick escape from the putrid smell extremely difficult.
Please advise Chevrolet that their cup holder design is ineffective and far below the standards that I am sure you wish to uphold in this country.
Many Thanks.

(*UK translation - "lift")

Friday, January 9, 2009

So...language barrier.

Last night the Wildside Team played "Celebrity".
It would seem that my British background does not lend itself to play this game in America. This became obvious when some of my chosen "famous people" turned out to be unknown to the rest of the group. However, the nail on the coffin was my attempt to remember the name of the rap artist from Jaime's description resulting in me shouting
" littlie? smallie?!??".